Living to Die
by NotJustAMuggle
Summary: Harry returns to Hogwarts to find the last horcrux and pays Snape a little visit. A re-write of the way that Harry founds out he is going to have to die. A must read for any Harry/Snape fans out there.
1. Chapter 1:Reunions

**Living To Die**

**Disclaimer: I think everyone knows I don't own these characters**

**Chapter One: Reunions **

Optimism echoed off the walls in the Room of Requirement. For the first time since the death of Dumbledore, the students of Hogwarts had found a reason to laugh. Harry Potter had come back to Hogwarts; the Light shall reign once more. The members of Dumbledore's Army gathered around Harry, Ron, and Hermione, waiting eagerly for the plan of attack. It was time to take Hogwarts back.

"Listen, there is a lot we have to do and little time to do it. There is something I need to find – and someone I need to see." As Harry spoke, Ron and Hermione gave him a puzzled stare.

"I think it's time I paid the dear new headmaster a visit," Harry growled softly, fire in his eyes. Hermione's eyebrows shot up in alarm.

"Harry! No! You can't! Dumbledore would have wanted you to focus on the task at hand. He-"

"He would have wanted to know why the man he trusted with his _life_ betrayed him. So do I."

Hermione whispered her disproval fervently. "Harry, this is just too dangerous. He could _kill_ you."

"To be honest, Hermione, I think I have gotten used to laying my life on the line. I know it's risky, but there is a time when a man has got to take responsibility for his actions. Tonight is Severus Snape's night."

Ron squared his shoulders in a sort of resigned determination. "Alright, mate, I'll go with you."

"No – I have to do this alone. You two, go and find the horcrux. We know it's got something to do with Ravenclaw, so ask any student from that house if they know of any important artifacts or _something_. It's …" Harry looked up and realized that they had completely forgotten about the inhabitants of the Room of Requirement, who were all staring at them thoroughly confused.

"Everyone, follow Ron and Hermione's lead. They know what to do," Harry gave them both a quick hug and a tentative smile.

"I'll meet up with you later."

Before logic was allowed a chance to enter Harry's brain, he hurried off towards the exit. One last look at his friends confirmed the feeling that had invaded Harry's heart. These were the only people he had ever been able to call family. His life was worth losing for the sake of theirs. With that final thought to accompany him on his mission, Harry flung his invisibility cloak over his shoulders and turned the doorknob. Back to business.


	2. Chapter 2: Secrets

**Chapter Two: Secrets**

Once in the hallway of Hogwarts, Harry pulled the Marauder's Map out of his pocket and searched diligently for Severus Snape. He was not frequenting the Headmaster's Office, nor was he in his usual habitat: the dungeons. Harry had almost resigned to the fact that perhaps he was away from Hogwarts when he spotted the little dot that was labeled Severus Tobias Snape. The professor was not inside the castle at all, but rather roaming the castle grounds. He paced along a spot that Harry knew all too well. It was besides the lake, a tall and beautiful tree that supplied the perfect amount of shade for hot summer days. A plethora of students, Harry included, had sat underneath that very tree. The Marauders had haunted that spot once, many moons ago. Snape had been there then as well, ridiculed by Harry's father in front of his peers. It seemed ironic that the Potions Master would be there now.

Harry walked quietly and purposefully to the front doors. He had no real plan in mind of what he would do when he encountered Snape, but he knew that it must be done. With revenge in his heart, he slipped through the entrance of Hogwarts and into the dark and starry night.

The wind blew with gusto as Harry made his way towards the lake. He struggled to keep the Invisibility Cloak from blowing away, then decided it was best to keep just take it off anyway. Stealth was never Harry's strongpoint and he didn't want to seem as if he was hiding from anyone. Off in the distance, Harry could see the outline of Severus Snape. He was facing the lake, his long black robes billowing in the wind. Harry continue his steady march forward, wand outstretched. Snape was by far the superior wizard, but hopefully Harry would enough of an advantage with his element of surprise. He was about five feet away when he hear the menacing voice of Professor Severus Snape.

"You have got nerve showing up here , Potter," the aged man projected over the wind, not even turning around to face Harry.

"You've got nerve to even dare to pretend to be a _fraction_ of the man Dumbledore was!" Harry shouted and lifted his wand, shouting "Expelliarmus!". With lightning fast agility, Snape whipped around and blocked the spell. Harry fired again and again, naming off any spell that came to his head. Snape repeatedly reflected them, but made no attempt to fight back. The two men moved closer together, their wands orchestrating an intricate dance filled with color and sound.

"I have no intention on fighting you, Harry Potter," Snape called out. He could see the hurt in the young man's eyes, physically see the burden that the poor boy had been carrying for the past seven years. _So much pain, so young_ Severus thought remorsefully.

"Then you are a coward! He never should have trusted you! How could you, Snape? How could you look a man who had given you _everything _in the eyes and murder him? You spineless coward!"

"I did not murder him, Potter."

"I was there! I watched you."

"What you saw was a prearranged agreement between Dumbledore and I that was merely being fulfilled." The bizarre nature of that comment made Harry stop trying to curse Snape.

"What are you talking about?"

Snape spoke with uncharacteristic patience. He owed Harry Potter, of all people, an explanation. It wouldn't be easy, but it was necessary. Dumbledore had once requested that Snape tell Harry of his destiny when the time was right. Feeling that he wasn't going to get another opportunity like this again, he knew that the time was now.

"There is something that I must tell you, Potter. Something that Dumbledore wants you to know."

"How do I know that I can trust you?" Snape thought for a moment, then reached into his robes and pulled out a minuscule vial of a clear-colored liquid. "Surely you know what this is, Potter."

"Of course, Veritaserum."

"And you are aware of the functions of such a potion?"

"It makes someone tell the truth."

Snape allowed a small smirk to escape. "At least I taught you _something_ in potions class."

"As I remember it, _professor, _you threatened to use it on me."

"Well, given your background, it seemed to have been necessary. Now, I am going to take this dose of Veritaserum. Since I would have the inability to lie, will you believe what I have to tell you then?"

Harry hesitated for a moment. Why was he even bothering to listen to this? Surely it was a trap. Snape was delaying him so that Voldemort could arrive and kill him. And yet, something stopped Harry from walking away. Perhaps it was the look in Snape's eyes. That kind of soft look that was extremely rare for a man like Snape. Or maybe it was because Harry wanted to know what secret Dumbledore would entrust in Snape that he hadn't told Harry. Whatever it was, Harry's heart told him to stay and he followed it.

"Alright, but I don't have a lot of time. Swallow the potion and tell me what I need to know." Snape uncorked the vial and slipped the liquid into his mouth. He grimaced at the taste and looked thoughtfully at Harry before he began to speak.

"Before we begin, I want you to know that I did not want to be the person to tell you this."


	3. Chapter 3: Truth

**Chapter 3: Truth **

**Author's Note: Thanks to all of you who have supported this story and commented! I apologize for leaving it untouched for so long. **

Green eyes gazed upon black, black ones upon green. For a moment, it seemed as if the world had entered a state of shock as Harry Potter and Severus Snape faced each other, silently observing the man that each loathed. Snape's heartbeat began to quicken and a cold sweat crept along his back. This was the moment. The moment in which he must tell Harry what had been waiting for him his whole life. He opened his mouth to speak, and yet, those emerald green eyes held him like a captive. Those were Lily's eyes; this was Lily's flesh and blood, her only connection left upon this earth. He issued forth a mute prayer – _Lily, give me strength_.

"Potter, before I say anymore, I must ask you. What else do you have left?" Snape's face resumed its emotionally devoid appearance.

Harry's voice was like ice. "I don't know what you mean."

"Come now, Potter. I know that you have not been sitting idly these past few months. What else do you have to do?" Silence was Harry's only response.

Anger coursed through Snape. They were getting nowhere, and time was too precious to waste at this point. Ever loyal to the memory of Lily, Snape stepped forward cautiously and tried a different approach.

"H-Harry," he paused as the boy retreated from Snape's advance, "I need you to listen to me. I cannot give you anything unless you cooperate. Pl-Please, what do you have left?"

There was a long pause before Harry opened his lips. "Three horcruxes. I have one, but it's not destroyed."

"Which three?"

"Why should I be telling you this, Snape? What gives you the right to interrogate me? You have given me nothing so far."

Snape found himself caught at a crossroad. Should he press further, ignoring the burning questions, and risk losing Harry's interest? Or should he reveal that side of himself that he swore never to let loose? A moment of silence met him as he pondered.

"I went to school with your mother."

The confusion on Harry's face was almost comical if it hadn't been for the situation at hand. "What?"

Snape looked Harry square in the eyes and spoke loudly. "I went to school with your mother."

"Yes, I know. What has this got to do with anything?"

Snape hesitated. "She was – a friend. We knew each other long before we came to Hogwarts. I knew Lily Evans, and she did not deserve to die."

"She died because of you, Snape. Your service to _him_ was the reason I don't have parents…"

"And it is something I am forced to live with every single day of my existence." Snape closed the gap between them a little more. "Since that day, when I found out what happened to her, I have been loyal to Dumbledore, and _only_ Dumbledore." A realization came upon Harry.

"Did you- "

"Love her? With all of my being." There was a moment in which the two men simply looked at each other, contemplating the different paths their lives had taken. Everything could have been so very different…

Snape swallowed hard. "And your mother loved you very much. She died to save you and that night, in that room, when she sacrificed her life, the Dark Lord made his biggest mistake: he made another horcrux. His soul attached to the only, only living object in the room. His soul attached to you." Harry's heart dropped as he dreaded the words his old Potions professor would speak next.

"Neither can live while the other survives, Harry. You are the horcrux he knew meant to make. To kill him, you must die."

"N-no," Harry stuttered, "you're lying…" But the retort fell on his lips and he sank to his knees. Everything he had worked for, his whole life summed into such few words – _you must die_. It was as if his body had already died, a cold, numb corpse lying on the vibrant, dewy grass. The contrast was so stark. A dead man amongst the living, marked at birth in order to work towards the greater good. He had been, since birth, living to die. Words failed him as he fell.

A pair of strong hands gripped his shoulders as Snape took hold of Harry. They sat upon the ground together, the Potions Master trying to keep ahold of Harry's dying body. Slowly, Harry lifted his head upwards and stared at Snape. "You - ." But that was all that the poor boy could manage before sobs racked through his body, cries as desperate as a dying animal's.

Severus, a man who had never expressed any emotion, did the only thing he could think to do. He took the boy into his arms, cradling the grieving body. As they lay on the grass, Harry's body heaving in despair, Snape bend his head downward and deliver a small kiss onto the scraggly, black head of Harry Potter. Softly, he whispered, "I'm sorry."

**Well, guys, I think that's about it for this story. It could be continued, but I don't want to bother writing more unless readers are really interested in it being continued. What do you guys think? Please leave me a review. Thanks so much for reading! It means so much. **


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